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Goofy Quotes

Goofy shit your Mayor heard, said or read on any given day.

Your Mayor, at the 12 Folsom bus stop:
Is that your mastodon on the ground?

A comment from Goof City’s voluminous spam archive:
The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. All the winners are from Earth.

Your Mayor, on Facebook:
Has Chumbawumba seen Chupacabra, I wonder.

Your Mayor, calling after a stranger on the street:
“HEY! Is that a gay porn address book?”

Your Mayor, in an email:
Chinchillas are the most privileged of the rodent class. They are born wearing chinchilla coats.

Your Mayor, on Facebook:
Do we all need a formaldehyde filtering plant and just don’t know it?

Your Mayor, in an email:
I am under-employed. Most people use only the standard 10% of their brain. I employ only 5% of mine.

Your Mayor, in a flickr comment:
I couldn’t think of any other orange vomit.

Your Mayor, on Facebook:
I’d rather be a rotting p***y than a blistering c**t.”

Goofedy doo-dah goofedy-ay. My oh my what a goofedy day.

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